Let's get CLASSICAL!!!

When it comes to air travel, the most important things to remember are earplugs, deodorant and patience, no need to worry about turbulence, it makes you feel alive!


Let's get geographical!!!

I write this blog with a heavy heart...not from sadness, but purely from eating so much delicious food in my travels, that I'm quite sure my arteries are heavy from lard.

It was on a walking tour of Prague where I discovered the love of my life. No, it wasn't a European suave chap...it was some deliciously amazing doughnuts...but not just any doughnuts. The dough had been wrapped across a steel pipe-like device and baked so it was soft and squishy in the middle. The crispy outside was smothered in cinnamon and sugar, inside, Nutella was smeared liberally. I'm not sure the exact name for this amazing treat that I'm tempted to try and replicate upon my return home to Aus to consume it daily, but if I had to hazard a guess, it would be called "heaven".

I promise I won't go on about food for all of this blog, even though it has dominated my introduction, I just find food an easy way to remember locations and experiences.

Not many people know this, but I have a skill that I would personally describe as 'superhuman'. Where Superman can fly and is bullet-proof, Spider-Man can shoot webs and jump, and Wonder Woman can fly and look smashing in hotpants, my superpower is I have a really good memory where I can remember occurrences just because I can relate it to the food I consumed. For instance, I can remember we enjoyed a picnic of cheese, olives, bread and goldfish shaped savory cookies on Anzac Day in Gallipoli in 2010. When I broke my wrist in 1997 I had a small portion of spag-bol because, despite being very hungry, Mum thought I was in too much shock to enjoy a big meal and when my younger brother was born in 1990 Grandma made us sandwiches with white bread and mince.

Yes, I'm weird.

So this europtrip, it has been the glorious food at various locations which will help me to retain vivid memories of France, Hungary, Poland and the Czech Republic.

As another way for me to retain information, allow me to breakdown my last few days noting the highlights (while of course paying tribute to the food!).

Day five: We board a bus bound for Krakow, Poland. Passing through Slovakia we buy a massive block of Milka chocolate destined to melt in my sister's hand-bag. I make a to-do list for the afternoon and among the most prioritized items, is to kick Sean (my sister's partner) for telling us the trip would be five hours, it has now been seven.

Day six: We wake early to catch a shuttle bus to experience what is described to be the 'worst place on earth', Auschwitz. The camps are everything that is expected, bleak, eery and because it is winter, cold. You can only imagine how horrific it would have been for the many who were promised a better life and ended up here.

Day six...and a half: We set off on an overnight train from Krakow to Prague. Squeezing into a four- bed cabin, we settle for the night. Suddenly the train halts and Caitlin, my cousin, is catapulted from her bed and lands face first, tongue on the crusty train floor, enjoying the shoe jam of the passengers prior. For the remainder of the night she is too scared to sleep and commits herself to lying on her back to try and limit the amount of germ infused stench from penetrating through her jacket from the sheet-less couchette. Meanwhile, during the night, my sister gets up to go to the bathroom and upon her return, cannot find our cabin. She even accidentally opens the train steward's cabin while he is sitting on his bed in his Y-fronts (he wasn't really in his Y-fronts but that was the image I got).

Day seven: Arriving in beautiful Prague we realise from the aforementioned train journey we need showers and our room is not ready at our hostel. My sister and I opt for a brain-freezingly cold non-private shower near the hostel's pool and half strip off because there isn't anyone around. Feeling refreshed as we change we look to the ceiling, 'oh no, there are cameras!' Feeling slightly violated we trek up to reception to dump our luggage and we are greeted by the male receptionist. 'I've found a room for you,' he says a little too kindly. We can't help but think it was the earlier strip show that awarded us the favour.

We catch up with some mates before we happily discover every meal in Prague is sided with delicious dumplings and a great deal of meat or gravy. Finding a free walking tour we then begin a trek of Prague with a Czech guide who accentuates random vowels as she contemplates the English language...of course way better than my attempt of Czech.

Freezing, as it has started to snow, dinner is enjoyed at a traditional Czech cuisine restaurant. My meal of a pork knee is the size of my head and I do a pretty good job of devouring most of it.
Day eight: Much the same as day seven, except we demolish about five doughnuts and more food. Returning to our hostel we get ready for our trip to the French alps.

So now, on board Swiss Airlines, I will forever remember the flight, not because of the 'charming' company of my fellow travelers, the snow capped mountains below or how I've almost completed my latest travel blog, my flight can be remembered from the delicious tiny slab of Swiss chocolate I pretty much have just 'inhaled'.

Weekly invention: My sister still hasn't got her luggage back so this week I would like to invent an
app or phone device that like 'find my friends' it would be called, 'find the sneaky bastard selling my luggage on the black market'....or put simply 'find my luggage'. Of course there would be a bit of work involved in developing this invention as the receiver kept in the luggage would have to be pretty special to not interfere with plane equipment. I'll let someone else work out the particulars....but would like a 50 percent cut.

Until next week, sante! Cheers!

Actually make that 60 percent.